Better to Cry Now
Winner of the National Indie Excellence Award for LGBTQIA Non-Fiction, Better to Cry Now: Shaping the Flow of a Gay Black Man traces Geoffrey Newman’s remarkable journey from the segregated classrooms of the 1950s to the forefront of American arts education.
When his white teachers told him he was destined to fail, Geoffrey refused to accept their verdict. Through determination, intellect, and the creative spirit that would define his life, he opened doors that others tried to close. From discovering his voice in theater to pioneering new programs at Montclair State University and Howard University, his path became one of resilience, mentorship, and leadership.
Told with candor and grace, Better to Cry Now reveals not only a life of artistic achievement but also the deeply personal work of embracing one’s identity. In sharing his story as a Black gay man in America, Geoffrey Newman reminds us that authenticity is both an act of defiance and a form of healing.
Better to Cry Now is more than a memoir — it’s an invitation to find strength in vulnerability, purpose in adversity, and beauty in the truth of who we are.
Where to Buy
Get your copy of Better to Cry Now: Shaping the Flow of a Gay Black Man by Geoffrey Newman, winner of the National Indie Excellence Award for LGBTQIA Non-Fiction. Available wherever books are sold.
Book Club Discussion Guide
Explore the themes of resilience, identity, and authenticity in Geoffrey Newman’s award-winning memoir, Better to Cry Now. Use these questions to spark meaningful conversation with your group.
Opening & Structure
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The memoir is divided into four acts (Striving, Hiding, Emerging, Belonging). Did you find that structure helpful for navigating Newman’s life story? Did any transitions between acts feel abrupt or especially powerful?
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At several points, the narrative moves backward in time, or circles back to prior themes. How did that affect your reading experience? Did it add layers or create confusion?
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The title Better to Cry Now comes from his mother’s counsel. What do you think she meant by that — and how does that message resonate (or evolve) over the course of the book?
Art, Education & Legacy
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Newman is both an artist and an educator. How did his roles in theater, directing, or academia help him make sense of his identity — or provide platforms for transformation?
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He recounts mentoring, building programs, and nurturing students. In what ways is his legacy in the arts or education part of the memoir’s message?
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If you could invite Newman to speak at a college today, what questions would you ask him about being a Black gay artist in academia?
Identity, Intersectionality, & Belonging
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Newman writes about “dual selves” — the performative public persona vs. private self (especially given race and sexuality). Where in the book did that tension feel most acute? Did you sense a turning point when those selves aligned.
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How does his mixed-race background and color consciousness shape his interactions in different communities (Black, white, gay, academic)? Did you notice moments where ambiguity is a source of strength, challenge, or both?
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In what ways does the story reflect or diverge from broader narratives of the civil rights era, the gay rights movement, or Black queer identity in America?
Reflective & Forward-Looking
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If Better to Cry Now had a sequel — what would you want to hear about next? What aspects of his life (or emotional interior) feel incomplete or teased?
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Did reading this memoir reshape your empathy, assumptions, or understanding of someone living at the intersections of race, sexuality, and ambition? How?
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For readers who may face their own identity conflicts, what lessons or cautions can be drawn from Newman’s journey?
Adversity, Resilience & Emotion
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What are some of the most emotionally charged or vulnerable passages in the memoir? Why do they resonate (or not) with you?
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Newman frequently faces institutional bias (in schools, colleges, academia). Which episodes struck you as most unjust or surprising? Did any prompt you to draw parallels to the present?
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The memoir doesn’t shy away from setbacks. But how does Newman balance vulnerability and agency? Do you think he sometimes protects or softens parts of his story — intentionally or otherwise?
Community, Connection & Impact
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Newman’s story is deeply rooted in both personal evolution and the communities that shaped him. How does he use his platform to give back — through teaching, advocacy, or artistic collaboration?
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What do you think the memoir reveals about the role of community in personal healing and growth?
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Did the book challenge your ideas about leadership, representation, or what it means to create spaces for others to thrive?